Last night I watched “Frankenhooker” with a merry band of stalwart b-movie buffs. It’s not as bad as it could have been and was better than it had any right to be. If you’re afraid of a little … well, a lot of harmless nudity and PG-13 sex scenes, then you should give this one a pass.

We did learn many things:

1) Nothing stimulates brain function like a “drill-gasm”
2) Nothing is as absorbent as prostitute parts
3) H.O.O.K.E.R. isn’t really that great of an acronym for a group on public decency
4) When the freezer’s a rockin’ …
5) “I’ve got eleven girls inside me” isn’t as fun as it sounds.
6) “This here’s Jersey-boy … Dr. Jersey-boy!”

Movie in a sentence: “When a man’s lost his ‘ho’s, he ain’t got nothing!”


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